Tandem Nursing

My little girl R, just said to me, "need beer, kay?"

Her Dad sometimes lets her have sips when he is drinking a micro brew, which I really don't love. She now begs for it. Should I be worried? She also thinks soda or kombucha tea, or any beverage in a brown bottle is beer. What will people think?- hee hee?

That was just random (yet oddly applicable when on the subject of suckling on addictive fluids), but the main subject of this post is my hesitant decision to cut off the milk. Baby G is now 7 weeks old and we have been tandem nursing. And here, I left off, and did not finish writing this post until a few weeks later, because motherhood for me is ridiculously busy and lacking time to blog.
I had been proud and excited to nurse both together. I thought it was undoubtedly a good idea to nurse R, until she is at least 2, if not 3. E and T nursed until their fourth birthdays. I thought it would deepen the relationship between her and her little brother and give us time to cuddle calmly and sweetly. It was valuable I think to help her be loving toward her little brother. She would often let him lay on top of her while they nursed together, and would even stroke his little head. So sweet. What wasn't sweet, though was her terrible toothy latch that left deep marks near my nipple, her desire to kick him with her foot or lay on him with her heavy body, and least sweet were the horrible fits that she threw day after day, hour after hour, as she BEGGED for nursing way more than I could tolerate. I eventually limited her to suckling just at nap and before bed at night, and then it became begging for "sleepytime" all day long, and when we were out anywhere, she would just cry and whine the whole time to go home and have "sleepytime". I began attending La Leche Leage meetings, and discussing tandem nursing with other moms who do it. I borrowed their book "Adventures in Tandem Nursing". I accessed lots of good advice and kept re-encouraging myself to continue and try to work with her. It was not feeling good, though. I had to realize that my ideal about this was not fitting with this very individual child. It has been a huge lesson every time I realize that there are so many exceptions to every rule of child development with this particular child of mine. Finally, a few days before her second birthday, when G was almost 8 weeks old, I told her with sadness, relief and resolve, "Tomorrow is the last day of nursing. You will nurse tonight at bed, tomorrow at nap, tomorrow night at bed, and then when you wake up in the morning you will be all done, because you are older now, and your teeth are big and hurt my nipples. Your teeth are for food now, and not for nursing anymore. I love you so much, and I will always cuddle you, forever and ever". Oh, the heartbroken crying. Oh, the shrieking and wailing for two more weeks, as I wondered in distress if I had made a mistake and taken something vital away too soon. Then there was a good deal less trauma for the third week. She still asks at least twice a day, but I think we are almost over it, and it has been much less difficult than nursing her was. I may wonder until she is a young adult and able to tell me for sure, whether or not she still REALLY needed it. I do so love that girl.