Living In My Sanguinity: Are you my Mother?

I used to read this book to my boys when they were smaller. It's about a little bird who hatches in the absence of it's mother and goes searching for her. As it walks along, it asks everything it runs into; animals, a car, a tractor, etc, "are you my mother?". They all reply, "No, I am not your mother, I am a________(whatever each thing is). I feel, after a non-relaxing and rather busy and exhausting Mother's Day weekend during which I did a lot of Mothering, a distinct commonality to this lost hatchling. A deep sense of questioning and longing- where is my mother?, and as an adult with overwhelming responsibility and as a mother who is in such demand, how may I find the care and nurture that one feels when under the wing of their Mother? In actuality, I know where my mother is physically located, (I spoke to her on the telephone last night) but on an emotional level, as well as on a practical day-to-day-I-need-help level, I cry out, "WHERE IS MY MOTHER"?

The day before Mother's Day was full, busy and very productive. We went to a children's clothing exchange in the morning, and found some nice things for my kids while getting rid of a bag of outgrown things that we were finished with. Clothing exchanges are the best. Lots of women in this town have them for us clothing crazed, adult females, and they are always insanely crowded and remind me of scavenger birds attacking for survival. It's not quite that bad- I am exagerating, but the one I went to last month was at a friend's house, and there were at least 30 women digging aggressively through many piles of clothes in every room of her house, and getting very excited about the treasures they were finding. I have a hard time in crowds since I have some sort of protective instinct over my baby and prefer calm, spacious and quieter situations. Of course I end up going anyway, because I am a woman, and I do love new clothes.
Anyway, this was the first children's exchange I have been to, and it was much mellower and I thoroughly enjoyed it. Son #2 picked out some funny items, which show his distinctive personality and style. Yellow crocs with one orange backstrap. High wasted suspender pants with a green and black, checkered pattern, etc.

Here he is, sweeping up leaves to add to our worm bin as bedding.
After the clothing swap, we went and bought a 5 gallon bucket full of red worms to put in our vermi-composting bin which we completed this weekend. This project has been going on for a long time, so I am proud to say that we now have worms as the newest pets in the family.

He worked so hard at filling the bin with leaves, after son #1 put in a lot of shredded newspaper that he soaked in water.

We used the big garbage can to tear the paper into and stirred it around with water from the hose, squeezed it out a little and added it to the bin. Then the paper and leaves got mixed together with our hands.

And finally, it was ready for the worms.
The two of them dumped the contents of the bucket into the bin, and spread it evenly through the three sections.

Camera shy, Son #1 who has been stealing and wearing all of my hoodies lately, succesfully ducked out of the picture once again.
Ha, I finally got one.

This time I asked nicely, saying that I want to document that he was a part of this, and he showed me his sweet face. He is such a cute boy!

Baby was somewhat unhappy during this whole process. She was going through some hardcore teething (I found her first top tooth- the front left one, poking out of the gums that night. It is her third tooth, total.) She was also in need of a nap.

And here they are, crawling around in their new home, in a hurry to snuggle down in the bedding, away from the sunlight! Welcome wormies, we will feed you much garbage.

The boys had fun holding their new pets. I did, too.

On Friday, Mystery Man and his Mom brought me an early gift of garden starts, a Gooseberry bush and a nice cactus. This is the first gift he has ever given me in all of the time I have known him. He is somewhat philosophically against gift giving, I think. It is pretty special, because it is such a rare thing. If I ever move, I will have to dig up the berry bush and move it with me. I couldn't bear to leave it behind. As for the cactus, which he picked out carefully for me, I will put it in a pot which will be very moveable!

Mother's Day morning I got up at 7AM and made a big brunch for Mystery Man's Mom, which we brought to their house later that morning and ate with them. We took a walk around their neighborhood in the afternoon and stopped by Fossil Creek garden center. I found some woolly creeping thyme, which I planted in my perennial garden today. I love it. I think it will be beautiful when it spreads. It reminds me a little of moss, but it needs less watering and can live in Colorado. I will take a picture of the perennial bed, when I finish weeding and planting. It still needs a lot of work. I am planning to put in some strawberries starts that we bought the other day, too. Son #1 gave me a gift certificate worth him cooking me two weekend breakfasts whenever I choose. I look forward to using it!
Later on Mother's Day when I was out weeding the garden with the kids, my friend Suzanne stopped by (I mentioned her in another recent post- she is pregnant and we have only recently gotten to know each other) and brought me a tomato plant and some chocolates with a beautiful Mother's Day card full of touching words. I was so surprised. What an incredibly loving gesture. We are becoming good friends and I am thrilled about it.